I’m glad you’re here. I invite you to join me on the journey as I find my voice and share my life out loud.
#HopeandHealing
All in Survivor
Truth is difficult. Pain is part of our journey and as parents, all we ever want is to spare our children from it. We want it so much our flesh tries to force us into seeing safety in other people and places because we crave it so badly. And then we play pretend and unwittingly force our children to do the same thing. Our very desire to create a feeling of safety takes the actual safety away.
It wasn’t that I was pretending to BE someone else, actually. What I was doing is never allowing my own needs or wants to be considered or even realized. From the smallest decisions - where shall we eat dinner? To the largest ones - where shall we live for the rest of our lives? I didn’t even ask myself what I wanted. I didn’t even want to know. I only wanted to know how I could “show love” to others by doing what they wanted. In the process I completely lost who I was.
As my daughter begins her journey of dating and relationships, I’ve found myself revisiting my past to help her navigate her present. Gentlemen. Predators. All the shades inbetween. Like most women, I have multiple chapters where I was forced into something sexual I didn’t want, followed by a period of pain and shame-filled actions as a result. Perhaps by writing my experience here, I can help other daughters navigate their present, too. Perhaps I can help you?
